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Ask Me Elyse: How to Avoid Feeling Inferior to Others

Women feels like everyone is surpassing her and she can't do anything right.

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Ask Me Elyse is a question and answer advice column dealing with a wide range of topics including relationships, friendships, work, and family. Ask Me Elyse tries to give advice that is saucy yet practical, empathetic yet honest. Do you have a burning question that you would like to ask? Is there an issue that you can't seem to figure out? If so email your questions to

Dear Elyse,

I'm in my early thirties (female) and I feel like all of the women my age are surpassing me. Everyone is getting married, having kids, buying houses and generally moving faster than I am. I'm still living at home.Sometimes I want to just give up and take on the first guy who likes me so that I can catch up to them. I can't bear to see all of their pictures of their kids on Facebook and to see them in town walking with their kids in tow. I feel like an inchworm compared to them.

Yours, Feeling Inferior


Dear Feeling Inferior, 

First of all, I completely understand that you would feel out done by; it really bites to think of yourself as a sub-human being. Facebook culture makes you more aware of how many people have kids and are married already. Yet, if there were no Facebook - you probably wouldn't know how many of your peers had kids. My suggestion is to turn off seeing their posts if you know that it will upset you. In addition, realize that there are other measures of success besides getting married, having a house, and having kids. Decide what YOU want and then strive for it. 

Yours, Elyse 


Elyse Bradshaw Seinfeld is a writer living on Long Island. She is working on her first book, Stripper on The Loose which will be coming out soon. She considers herself a student of life: from her experiences as a recruiter, a student advisor, a masseuse, a chef, a tennis professional, and a radio show booker, she has seen and lived it all! For more of Elyse's helpful tips, be sure to check out her blog, at or email her at