Ask Me Elyse: Single With Few Dating Options

Single karate instructor in the suburbs struggles to find viable dating options and honor commitments.

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Ask Me Elyse is a question and answer advice column dealing with a wide range of topics including relationships, friendships, work, and family. Ask Me Elyse tries to give advice that is saucy yet practical, empathetic yet honest. Do you have a burning question that you would like to ask? Is there an issue that you can't seem to figure out? If so email your questions to

Dear Elyse,

I’m a single, male karate instructor. I don’t date that often because the hours of my job aren’t conducive to it. In addition, I live in an area where there aren’t many single people; it’s mostly families. I’m helping take care of an ailing grandmother. Recently, a parent of one of my karate students started flirting with me. The attraction is mutual but I’m concerned about how it will affect my job and my relationship with the student. One of the fellow instructors is always looking for me to make mistakes.

Yours, Karate Instructor with few dating options

Dear Karate Instructor with few dating options,

First of all I commend you for keeping your head straight. You must be going insane with the demanding work hours and few companions and dating options. I hate to invoke clichés but all work no play makes a boy gray.  Now that you have a viable dating option, grab it! If you are going to date the parents of one of your students keep a low profile at first. Don’t’ make out in the middle of the lobby in front of fellow instructors. Also, not to insult your intelligence, but please verify that your potential mate is single, dating a married client is a surefire way to unemployment. When the relationship becomes serious then you can slowly tell people at work that you are dating one of the parents. In addition it could help to have her kids switch instructors so it doesn’t look like you are favoring her kids. Good luck!

Yours, Elyse

As a tennis instructor, Elyse is intimately familiar with the difficulties of dating parents of students and the irregular hours of the service industry. Elyse is glad to assist anyone who has difficulties with these issues. 


Elyse Bradshaw Seinfeld is a writer living on Long Island. She is working on her first book, Stripper on The Loose which will be coming out soon. She considers herself a student of life: from her experiences as a recruiter, a student advisor, a masseuse, a chef, a tennis professional, and a radio show booker, she has seen and lived it all! For more of Elyse's helpful tips, be sure to check out her blog, at