Every bride knows that without her bridal party, the wedding would be nothing. But what many brides face is a combination of friends who may have never met before and have extremely conflicting personalities. All you have to do is watch Bridesmaids to see what the result of catty or confrontational bridesmaids can be. As a bride, it is your job to keep them in line and make sure they know that the wedding is about one thing, you.

Picking out your bridesmaids can be a daunting experience within itself. You know you have to include some members of family, whether it is your sister, future sister-in-law, or a close cousin. Then there is the task of deciding who your made of honor will be. When choosing your maid of honor you should pick someone who you know you can trust to help you keep your bridal party happy and who knows your vision of what the wedding will be like. Once you can get your closest group of friends and family together, the hard part starts.

Whether it is the dresses, the bachelorette party, or some other menial wedding tradition, the most important part is making sure every bridesmaid opinion was heard and taken into account. The last thing you want is a bridesmaid who feels overlooked or less important than the rest of the group. Here are a few things you can do when keeping all of your bridesmaids happy!

Bonding Day: Once you get your group of bridesmaids together for the first time you should think about doing something girly and fun as a bonding experience. This can be as simple as going to dinner and a movie, grabbing drinks together after work, or spending the day out on any of Long Island’s beaches. A fun idea would be to take a trip out to the vineyards if it is the right time of the season. Have fun and easy conversation and see how everyone reacts to each other. Once you can get a feel for the group dynamics, it will be much easier to keep everyone happy with each other.

Dresses: This is probably the most feared day of brides everywhere, picking out bridesmaid dresses. As seen on many TV shows and movies, some bridesmaids think that this day is their shining moment and will refuse to wear a dress unless they are in love with it. Before you even step near a store, you should discuss your color theme with the bridesmaids and ask them all what they feel comfortable in. Once you arrive in a bridal shop, ask the consultant for help and give them the list of things you require in a dress. If you can figure out what each bridesmaid wants and feels good in before you go to the store, it will make it that much easier. Just make sure that each woman feels good in the dress.

Bachelorette Party: Your Bachelorette Party might not be something that you are in complete control of, but you can make your wishes clear to your friends before they even start planning. Some of your more conservative friends might get into clashes with your friends who want to go all out. You should sit down the group or send out some kind of mass email to let them know what you are comfortable with. It would be wise to have an extra conversation with your maid of honor so she can stay in control of the situation.